Becoming a charismatic person: a woman's secrets

Greek letter addressed to the female and male imagination: the "alpha" leader, i.e. the charismatic person. Today I ask myself the question: what is a charismatic man to me? How do I perceive the Alpha? Is self-confidence a myth, as the origin of the alphabet might make us believe?


I did not wish to elaborate a technical and technical text; nor to describe a fantasy. I wanted to decipher this precise typology and define its characteristics, as they appear to me. A testimony. A reality but not the truth. To finish this introduction, I wished to share with you the difficulties to make conscious what emerges, in my eyes, from the domain of the unconscious.


First of all, I must confess that the Alpha man is rare. What I mean by rarity is that there are not many. This is also the reason why it leaves a memory, a mark, a positive stroke in a conscious being. It is also unique, in that one Alpha will not necessarily look like another. Under no circumstances, in this typology, can we try to make any generalization. But it is possible to determine its characteristics.


The Alpha man is a leader

The Alpha man is a leader, he distinguishes himself from the group, in a natural way, without constraint on others, by characteristics which are specific to him. How? He has become aware of his "power", in the sense that he knows himself perfectly, he is aware of his resource zones and his shadow zones; of his qualities and axes of progress. He accepts and assumes them. He accepts to be imperfect and is aware that he cannot control everything. He seeks to enhance his strengths by accepting his difference. It's his first strength. He is therefore the holder and actor of his personality, composed of dualities.

Self-esteem and self-confidence of the charismatic person

Why? Why? He holds the two essential elements, foundations of any personality: self-esteem and self-confidence. Self-esteem because he knows and embodies his values and beliefs; self-confidence because he has experimented and validated his experiences to transform them into skills. As we go along, self-esteem and self-confidence build and define the charismatic person.


He obviously has doubts, apprehensions, even fears; they are legitimate but strangely, they reinforce his charisma. At no time will they be assimilated to weaknesses, they will be the expression of the duality of his personality. In the opposite case, it would be characteristic of hyper-confidence... which would amount to saying, lack of confidence.


A good knowledge network

He enriches his personality through professional, social and emotional contexts. Alpha is in balance between these three contexts, which is why its success is not only oriented towards the opposite sex, it is also successful in the other two domains. Professional and social environments are rich, with a high network of knowledge. This balance in these three areas contribute to enriching his personality and achieve the positioning of leader, characterized by a strong charisma. He asserts himself without imposing himself. It is surrounded by a kind of "aura" and holds a strong power of attraction, even magnetism.


In view of the elements described above, the Alpha can be unanimously accepted. Nevertheless, it is often much appreciated or, conversely, hated. But he attracts women, yes, he attracts us. Not only because of a harmonious physique, this presumption (easy?) would then suggest that only the physique of an Alpha would make the difference. I don't think so. On the contrary, I think that it is his inner strength, his energy, his magnetism, his strong power of attraction that seduces and captivates us.


The charismatic person surprises

His approach is tinged with elegance and finesse, he has class and humour. A very personal and easy way to move, talk to us, look at us and smile at us. He knows how to tease us without hitting us. The general feeling that follows from this description is a feeling of fluidity, of spontaneity. He is inaccessible, elusive and sometimes distant but at the same time so close and intimate. And this ability to surprise us at a time when we weren't expecting it... Could it be a magician of gender relations?


The charismatic person is not a myth, he exists well. We have all, at least, met one, he/she has marked us, has not only passed in our life: he/she has left us unforgettable memories...